FrieAme AU where Friede's a paediatrician and Amethio's a terminally ill inpatient. Friede's in charge of Amethio's care and keeps telling himself not to get attached but oops Friede gets attached. So does Amethio. Contains main character death, obviously!

Thanks to my good friend for always contributing great ideas! <3

Wait I've figured out a way to incorporate Lk, Roy & Dot since I feel bad for always leaving them out of AUs lol

The three of them are doing some kind of school project where they have to create a mini documentary/report about the place someone's parent works, and they decide to do the hospital Lucca works at
[Me] Since Lucca is in charge of the children's ward, the three of them think it'd be interesting to focus on some of the stuff that goes on there
[Me] They get approval and do basic things like talking to the staff (Frie mostly, since Lk knows him the best) and film the public places around the ward
[Me] While they do follow the staff around to show what a day-to-day routine is, they've cautious about not showing the faces of any of the patients -- except for ones whose parents agreed could be in the footage (since it's just for school)
[Me] A couple of days before they're due to arrive and start filming, Frie asks Ame if he'd be willing to let the kids interview him and Ame's like "No fuck off" but then he realises that actually, most of the other kids are younger and can't really talk about things objectively, and their parents will likely try and sugar-coat things
[Me] So Ame decides he'll do an interview and tell them exactly what it's like being in a ward full of mostly terminally ill kids
[Me] I can't think of any specific scenes right now but Ame is pretty brutal and the LRD don't know what to make of him
[Me] Maybe they ask him a few questions and he's too abrasive so they cut the interview early
"[Me] Roy: I don't like that guy...
Dot: Idk, he's not wrong. It can't exactly be fun living in there
Roy: Yeah, but why's he so... bitter?
Dot: Don't ask me
Lk: ...I don't think he's bitter
Roy: Really? What is he then?
Lk: He seemed... sad to me. And lonely. Really, really lonely..."
[Me] The kids asking Ame stuff like "Why're you here?" and Ame's all "Even if I told you it means nothing to you or anyone else who's going to watch this" and then adds "But essentially it's because I'm going to die"
[Me] His answers are very pessimistic
[Me] Roy asking Ame what he does all day and Ame goes "Existing"
"[Me] Roy: No I mean like... do you have any hobbies?
Ame: Not ones I can do in hospital, no
Roy: Then... do you play with the other kids at all?
Ame: The 8-year-olds or the 5-year-olds? Of course not, don't be stupid
Ame: Also, even if I wanted to, I don't have the the energy. You try playing with kids when you're constantly exhausted"
"[Me] Lk: Er... Then, are there any parts of the hospital you do like? The staff members, the food, any particular places?
Ame: The staff members aren't horrible to the point of me wanting to move elsewhere, I suppose. The food... honestly, I hate it, but at least I get fed here
Ame: As for places... Well..."
[Me] Ame then explains the flower garden to the kids (this is before he finds out Luci is Weird Garden Man) and Lk's all excited because she's actually been there before! Not for a few years, but back when she was younger she would spend a bit of time sitting around waiting for Lucca to finish work, and she happened to discover the garden
[Me] Roy suggests they go visit the garden with Ame so they can take some photos of him there (Ame's past the point of caring and just goes "Sure whatever")
[Me] The three kids wait while Ame gets ready, and Frie comes over. They explain what they're doing and Frie's like "Well that's all fine and good but you're gonna need a guardian" and decides he's gonna tag along with them (much to Ame's displeasure)
"[Me] The walk there is getting more and more tiring each time Ame does it, so he hasn't been going as frequently. He lags slightly behind the others, with Frie leading the group.

It's not even that long of a walk. But it always exhausts Ame, and he doesn't want the others to see that."
"[Me] Seeing Roy energetically running about commenting on everything, Lk happily talking to Frie, and Dot diligently carrying the handheld camera equipment makes Ame feel something about his situation that he hasn't really felt before:

Jealousy"
"[Me] He should be like them. Doing some stupid school project. Spending time with kids his own age (even though he never got along with his classmates).

...Going to school"
"[Me] He was supposed to focus on studying these next few years. Get perfect grades and graduate at the top of his class. Get into a good university. Get a good degree. Find a good job.

And yet... he'll never have to worry about any of that. By the time these kids are sitting their next exams, he'll probably be dead"
"[Me] It makes Ame angry, but in a different way than usual. He knows it's not Roy's fault he's lively and fast. It's not Lk's fault she's friendly. It's not Dot's fault she's reliable.

But it makes Ame want to lash out at them. It makes him want to spell out just how lucky they are that they're not stuck in hospital. That they're healthy and... not dying"
[Me] Anyway they get to the garden and Luci isn't there, thankfully, so it's pretty easy to take a few photos of Ame (once he's caught his breath) standing amongst the flowers and sitting on the bench etc
[Me] Frie hangs back since there's not a lot of room and he doesn't want to get in the way... but he can't help but think that Ame looks extremely beautiful up next to all the colourful flowers and the vivid green plants
[Me] I don't really know where I'm going with the rest of this but maybe they ask Ame some more questions about what it's like at the hospital and kinds of things he has to endure, and Ame tells them, gross details included, so that it's somewhere on record
"[Me] Frie, later: I thought you didn't care about leaving data behind for other people?
Ame: I don't. But there's a difference between being a faceless statistic in a database and giving people a realistic idea of the hell of living the remainder of your days out in hospital
Frie: ............Oh. Yeah."
"[Me] Maybe after Ame dies, Lucca tells LRD since Lk asked her a couple of times following their visit how Ame was doing, and Lk is rather upset (so are the other two, but not as much).

Frie comes over to talk to Lk and tell her that Ame was ready to go etc. Lk, who's known Frie for many years, has never seen him look so sad about a patient dying before"
[Me] Roy asks Frie if Ame's family would be interested in the footage they shot of him & the photos they took, since he's pretty sure Dot still has the uncut stuff ("She saves everything!" Roy insists)
[Me] Frie... isn't sure if Gibe would be interested at all, but he says yes anyway, and Frie manages to get the files from Lucca. Though he waits until after Ame's funeral to give them to Gibe
[Me] (He also keeps copies for himself secretly because y'know that's his boyfriend)
[Me] Gibe initially doesn't look at the files. He can't. Ame's letter was too much for him, and he can't handle looking at anything else with Ame, either.
[Me] But then Gibe remembers Spi calling him out at the funeral and saying that Gibe's a coward etc and Gibe... Gibe realises he probably should look through the files. Even if just quickly.
"[Me] He looks at the photos first. The garden is a bit of an odd thing to him, but it's certainly not ugly.

Ame's expression in the photos is blank, but Gibe can tell there's a sense of mild disgruntlement there, too (probably at the fact that he's having his photo taken). He feels... weird seeing Ame again"
[Me] The thing that sticks with Gibe the most is how much healthier Ame looked. Sure, even then he was quite unwell, and Gibe can tell that, but compared how he was when he died, the difference is staggering
"[Me] Ame's always been skinny, but in the photos, he at least looked like he had some weight to him, especially in his face. Just normal teenage weight.

And yet, in the span of only a few more months, he lost all of that completely."
"[Me] Gibe's reluctant to watch the recordings, but he does so anyway.

If seeing Ame's face made Gibe feel odd, hearing him speak - in his usual, loud, clear, snappy voice - makes Gibe feel outright uncomfortable"
[Me] At the end, Ame couldn't talk. He could only make nondescript gurgles and almost baby-like sounds. As his health declined, his voice grew weaker too, and he would often find it easier to whisper rather than talk at a normal volume
[Me] Gibe had gotten so used to hearing Ame sound quiet and distant that hearing his "normal" voice was extremely jarring
[Me] But Gibe had never really heard Ame be so... snarky. Sure, he'd been snappy at times - he was a teenager, after all, but the way Ame spoke to the kids interviewing him was completely different to how Gibe recalled him speaking. Perhaps it was simply that they were a similar age.
"[Me] Gibe wondered if Ame had been in pain at all during the filming. He held himself well, and he didn't seem to be struggling, but knowing Ame, he would've wanted to act brave.

""Knowing Ame""... Gibe's aware he has no right to feel that way. He never knew Ame. Not properly."
"[Me] Gibe makes it through the first two video clips alright, despite his feelings of discomfort.

But then he gets to a clip of the kids, and Frie, in the garden that was pictured in the photos"
"[Me] There's a shot of Ame sitting on a wooden bench. He's covered in sweat, and he looks... exhausted. He's panting.

Was that... just from walking to the garden? It didn't seem very hot outside.

In the video, Frie hands Ame a bottle of water, and Ame hesitates before accepting it. He drinks about half the bottle and gives it back to Frie"
[Me] Once Ame calms down a bit, the boy in the video goes up to him, and the video ends
"[Me] Just how much had Ame pushed himself? How long had he been pretending he was fine when, in reality, he wasn't? How long had he been acting brave in front of others?

Had it been from the time he was hospitalised? Or even before that?

And the fact that Ame continued to act that way, at least in front of Gibe, until he was straight up unable to anymore..."
"[Me] Gibe recalls Ame's letter and how Ame talked about wanting to be strong and reliable and someone Gibe could be proud of.

Gibe didn't know why Ame felt that way, but all of a sudden, a certain scene pops into Gibe's head. A scene that occurred when Ame was little. A scene Gibe had forgotten about completely"
[Me] "Why don't you understand ANYTHING I tell you?! Why are you so useless?! All you do is get in the way and cause problems! Shut up! Stop crying! Only weaklings cry! I said STOP!" [Smack] "You're nothing but a disgrace!"
"[Me] Gibe sits there in silence. Why... had he been so angry at Ame back then? Why had he hit his son? He can't remember why he said those things to him, either.

...Was that why Ame tried so hard to be strong? Even when he was sick? Why he was so adamant to be brave up until the end?"
"[Me] Gibe doesn't even remember when that scene took place, or why. He has no memory of being that mad.

But, if anything, Gibe's horrified at himself. Why did he say those things to a child? What had made him lose his mind with unjustified rage to the point of hitting his son?"
"[Me] Not that that's an excuse. Gibe knows he's still responsible for it.

But why? Why would he do something like that? He remembers yelling at Ame. Ame was quite little, but Gibe doesn't know exactly how old he would've been. He doesn't recall anyone else being in the room with them, either."
"[Me] Had that... Had that been the only time he'd hurt Ame? Or had he done it more than once?

It was one thing to scold his son. That was a given if a child acted out or did something they shouldn't. But to scream at them? To hit them?"
"[Me] Ame's letter comes to mind again.

""I wanted to prove myself to you. I want to be a son you could be proud of. I wanted to grow up and be strong. I wanted to have my own family, and show my own children what it's like to have a father who actually loves them.

I wanted you to be proud of me as a son, but jealous of me as a father"
"[Me] ""I swore I'd never become like you. I swore I'd be better than you. That I'd show you what a family SHOULD be like.

But I was never able to do that. All I accomplished was destroying my own family. I ruined everything you had worked for. You have every right to hate a son as useless and worthless and pathetic as I am."
"[Me] ""I still haven't forgiven you for betraying and hurting Mother. I still hate you for sleeping with somebody else in her bed. I still resent you for throwing her away.

But if I had never said anything, maybe you and Mother would still be happy together. Or, if I was stronger, I could've properly protected Mother."
"[Me] ""Was Mother always trying hard to be strong, too? Was she trying to pretend that she wasn't hurting? Did she also think you'd get angry at her if she showed you her tears?

Or were you only ever like that with me? Is it just me who's not allowed to be weak?"
[Me] "Is it disgraceful for someone like Spinel to cry, too? Or am I the only one who's that pathetic to you?"
"[Me] Gibe can't bring himself to watch any of the other videos. He can't bring himself to do anything.

He wonders again how long Ame was pretending to be strong for. How long he forced himself to keep fighting in order to appease his father.

It makes Gibe feel sick. Why had Ame taken Gibe's words so seriously?"
"[Me] No. That wasn't the question he wanted to know. What he wanted to know was a question aimed at himself

Why had he said those things to a child?

It's only natural that children cry. It's only natural that humans cry when they're in pain. Gibe knows this. He knows he's the weird one for never crying over anything"
"[Me] And yet, despite everything. Despite his realisation. Despite his current feelings of regret and guilt...

Gibe still cannot shed a single tear over his dead son. It's not that he doesn't want to. And what he had said about not knowing how to stop once he starts was true, too.

But Gibe realises that he... has forgotten how to start crying"
"[Me] He genuinely doesn't remember the last time he cried. He'd been devastated at his wife's death, but he hadn't cried then. He'd just been angry.

But now he realises that he can't even feel angry over Ame's death. He just feels empty.

When had his emotions gotten so twisted? When had he reached the point that he could no longer feel anything?"
"[Me] Gibe decides to distract himself by returning to his work. He can't think about Ame anymore.

He doesn't deserve to think about Ame, anyway"
[Me] Anyway I just want Gibe finally realising he fucked up but not until after Ame's death and even though Gibe knows he fucked up he has no idea why he behaved like that towards Ame anyway and he has no excuses for himself at all

Spi having a bit of a mental breakdown when Ame dies due to survivor's guilt but also him blaming himself for not standing up to Gibe... Just letting Ame be hurt instead... Spi hates that he wasn't a better brother, and no matter how much Ame tells him he doesn't blame Spi, Spi still feels terrible
[Me] Spi running away from home because he thinks Gibe should be left alone as karma for being a shit dad (and Spi feels weird being in the house without Ame there)... I think he'd go off the rails a bit. Which he can do as a treat
[Me] I like to think Frie runs into him and helps him get back on track eventually...
[Redacted] That's just me wanting to include SpiLk everywhere but since you established that Lk eventually got to know Ame through school work, perhaps she pays her respects to him for years after he died because it's one of the first time she really faced death and it shook her to her core...
[Redacted] Since that was someone she talked to and knew, even if for a little while, knowing that he isn't there anymore... that affected her.
[Me] Ooooh I like that idea!
[Me] And Ame was close to Lk in age too, so it's different than if an elderly relative died or something
[Me] Maybe while Frie's taking care of Very Fucked Up Spi, Lk meets Spi and oh. That's the brother of the sad boy who died. And he's also... really sad and lonely. And Lk decides the wants to help him
[Redacted] Yes! I thought of them meeting through Frie too... and Frie would tell Spi that she is someone who comes to pay respects for Ame... Spi would be surprised that someone cared enough about him and she isn't even family...
[Me] Spi initially wonders if Lk has ulterior motives and knows his family's wealthy but then he learns that Lk's family run the hospital Ame was staying at so uh. It's clearly not that she's after money (she wasn't anyway)
[Me] Lk's just genuinely nice (which Spi isn't used to)
[Redacted] Yes! Honestly I want him to fall for her because of this. She cries a bit over Ame even though she didn't know him much...
[Me] Cute... (Lk vaguely reminds Spi of his mother a little bit. Kind and gentle. It's refreshing being around someone who cares...)
[Redacted] Also they would have an age gap which makes the potential relationship delicious... younger girl comforting older man after the death of his brother...
[Me] I'm imagining Spi would have gotten into drugs too (very bad coping mechanism but eh blame Gibe) by this point and Frie's trying to help get Spi off them... Maybe meeting Lk makes Spi realise that there are people out there who care about him and he should take proper care of himself...
[Me] And yes, SpiLk's age gap is glorious (He's like 5 years older than Ame in this AU and Ame was 16 when he died, so Spi's early 20s and Lk's... 14-15 at most when they meet?)
[Me] (Which doesn't seem like a lot but considering Lk's barely in high school and Spi's, y'know, an adult, lol)
[Redacted] I was thinking of Lk being in a high school uniform and how cute she would look next to Spi like that...
[Redacted] Girl in uniform and older man...
[Me] Spi in a business suit...
[Redacted] But yeah meeting Lk would change him
[Me] Frie does not trust Spi around Lk at all lol (Understandable)
[Redacted] Yeah especially if he is into dangerous things. He would kill Spi if he got Lk in trouble.
[Redacted] He could easily be a predator towards this cute girl!
[Me] But then Spi's all "Dude that's how I kinda saw you and my brother, for all I knew, you were doing lord knows what to him" and Frie promptly shuts up because oh god dammit Spi's right
[Redacted] He is... right actually (like Spi would wait for Lk to be an adult if they ever both fell for each other)
[Me] Spi would never actually hurt Lk! He's a gentleman (and also doesn't want to go to jail)
[Redacted] Yeah! He can keep it in his pants. Lk is super cute but he will wait... (they need to get to know each other though. But I am sure Lk would fall for him. She is into older men)
[Me] In the meantime, Spi can always fuck Frie I guess? (no)
[Redacted] I mean if Spi is out of his mind enough- (but Frie would not let him especially if he knows of Lk's feelings)
[Me] Maybe they're fuckbuddies or something until Spi starts having feelings for Lk and feels bad that he's fucking Frie so Spi does the mature thing and stops sleeping with Frie lol
"[Redacted] I love it... also Frie using Spi as rebound to grieve Ame is so terrible and good...

But yeah Spi would stop if he catches feelings for Lk. She is so innocent and never slept with anyone too.."
[Me] Love FrieSpi where they're actually super co-dependent and have a pretty Not Good relationship until Lk comes along and Spi falls for her and then he stops relying on Frie so much... And it forces Frie to mature a bit, too (In most scenarios Frie would fall for Ame but in this AU Ame's dead so lmao)
[Redacted] Also it's hilarious because Frie is Lk's first love and she ends up with Spi here and both men had a thing...
[Me] Delicious
[Me] Ame's death brings people together! (Sorry Ame)
"[Redacted] I am sure he would approve of Spi and Lk together.

(Now all I want is for Spi to bring her home, ie Gibe's place, when she is an adult so they can do stuff in Spi's room...)"
"[Me] Blacky, Spi's very pampered black cat: EXCUSE me?! Why are you bringing another person into your room?! Wait, why are you kicking me out?! Put me DOWN, human!
Spi: Y-You can go wait out there for a while, okay?"
[Redacted] Okay but what if Gibe wasn't supposed to be there for that weekend but actually he comes back and then he sees Lk over and that his remaining son brought a woman in the house- (Maybe Gibe recognizes Lk since she looks like Diana?)
[Me] I love it... Spi trying to come up with excuses and Gibe's like "Do you think I'm that stupid? I know exactly what you're up to" and both Spi and Lk get super embarrassed
"[Me] Gibe, who had an affair with someone in his own house: Yes, Spinel, you really are just ""hanging out"". Nothing else.
Spi: .........U-Um"
[Redacted] Yes! Since this happens after Ame died, I would like to believe that Gibe is less judgmental and more "chill" in some ways...
[Me] Gibe takes one look at Lk and goes "....Are you 18?" and Spi wants to die
[Redacted] Like he just doesn't want Spi to get Lk pregnant when they aren't married and Lk is still rather young
[Me] Yeah! Gibe wouldn't particularly care that Spi was dating someone, he just wants Spi to be careful. And make sure that he's not manipulating Lk somehow (or doing anything while she's underage)
"[Redacted] Yeah exactly! Mostly that.
Lk was shaking the whole time Gibe was there because that's an awful first impression and she didn't expect to meet her bf's dad like that... Gibe looks so serious and commanding... she thought he was going to kick her out"
[Me] Gibe unexpectedly saying something like "If he hurts you, tell me right away. I'll make sure he can't do it again" and Lk still thinks Gibe's pretty scary but... at least he's concerned for her? Maybe?
[Redacted] It's so cute! Spi never saw his dad like that either. It's all so unexpected.
[Me] (Part of it is that Gibe doesn't want Di to come yelling at him that Spi hurt her granddaughter but also he'd never sexually abuse someone. The sex with Luci was always consensual and he uh. Hardly slept with his wife, so. He might be emotionally abusive but even he knows not to hurt people sexually (especially women)
[Me] Gibe really being okay with emotionally abusing people but sexual abuse? He would never
[Me] (I'm joking, he doesn't realise he's emotionally abusive/manipulative)
"[Redacted] Love this stuff!
And tbh I like the thought of Lk being like... someone who could melt Gibe's heart a bit. I live thinking of their potential (platonically) and the thought that she is not only good for Spi but helps Gibe a little bit too..."
[Redacted] Sometimes Spi brings her over for dinner..
[Me] Yes... Lk manages to get through to Gibe a bit! Not much. But Gibe does respond to her kindness
[Me] Lk makes an effort to talk to Gibe. Initially Gibe wouldn't want much to do with her because she's related to Luci (Lk has no idea that Luci ever had anything to do with Ame's family) but she tries to... actually get to know him? In ways most people never have before
[Me] In many ways Lk reminds Gibe of how Luci used to be. Just much less of a pain in the ass lol
[Me] But Lk has the same sense of wonder and curiosity about her that Luci did back in high school
[Me] Because like. Lk knows Gibe's still sad about Ame. So she wants to be friendly with him. It's different than how she is with Spi, but... she can tell that Gibe's lonely
"[Redacted] Thinking about her calling him ""Gibe-san""... sometimes bringing up Diana around him since she doesn't know things were a bit tense between them.

Honestly I feel like he would almost grow to see her as a daughter. He feels a kind of affection towards her..."
[Me] Cute... I love the thought of Lk being the only one to truly realise just how sad Gibe is. Gibe thinks he doesn't deserve her kindness since he was so horrible to Ame (I think Gibe would admit that to her eventually) but Lk would tell him it's not about whether someone "deserves" kindness or not and that she wants to treat everyone equally with love
"[Redacted] Man, imagine that the first time in forever that he cries is with Lk though.

Spi would feel pissed that his dad made a scene in front of his gf when he wasn't there but.

It's progress if Gibe lets himself go around her."
[Redacted] He is a horrible piece of shit and she still thinks he deserves love!!
"[Me] Maybe something Lk says makes Gibe realise that he can, in fact, mourn Ame despite being a bad father.

""The way I see it, crying isn't a sign of weakness. If anything, it's a sign of strength. It takes courage to cry. You're admitting your pain, whether just to yourself, or to someone else. You're showing that you're hurting."
[Me] "So, to me, crying over someone's death isn't being weak. It's mourning their loss, yes, but you're also, in some ways, celebrating the fact that they existed. And that you met them and knew them. By crying, you're acknowledging that they don't exist anymore, and that that fact saddens you.
[Me] "I don't think it's wrong to not cry over death, since people express grief and sorrow in many ways, but... it takes a lot of strength to openly admit that you're upset about something, in my opinion. So I don't think Amethio would think any less of you for crying over him. Though I have no idea if he'd want you to or not..."
"[Me] Lk finishes with something like ""O-Or at least that's how I feel about it! I'm probably not making much sense, sorry!"" and she's a bit flustered because what the hell is she even saying to a man who lost his teenage son?

But then she looks up at Gibe, and... there's a single tear running down one of his cheeks"
"[Redacted] She is lecturing her bf's dad too-

But yeah Lk is pretty introspective so she would say smart things! And the thought that she makes Gibe cry and initially panic..."
"[Me] Gibe remembers something similar that Luci said way back when they first started dating

Gibe: Why do you like me? There's nothing interesting about me. Or appealing...
Luci: Do I need a reason? Why do I need to justify my love? Love - whether platonic, romantic, or sexual - is equal. Everybody is deserving of love and kindness."
"[Me] Luci: And even if I explained my reasons, you would rebuke them and tell me I was misguided and wrong, wouldn't you?
Gibe: ...
Luci: Love is something you cannot always explain or excuse or justify. But as long as it's there, as long as you feel it, it's what makes you - what makes us - human"
[Me] Luci: The way I see it, to lose the ability to love is to lose your humanity. Loving people is important. Sure, it's impossible to love everyone, but even if you love just one other person, it means you're human. It means you're capable of understanding the preciousness of another person's existence.
"[Me] Luci: To lose that... is to lose yourself
Gibe: I can't say I understand
Luci: [Laughs] Yeah, I thought not. That's just my weird little view of the world, though. Others feel differently, of course
Gibe: No, I mean... I don't understand love. What does loving someone even mean? Treasuring them? Wanting to protect them?"
"[Me] Gibe: I know that I want to spend time with you, and that you're special to me, and I think what I feel is love, but... What if it isn't?
Luci: The only one who can answer whether it's love is you. I have no idea. But from my perspective, you at least seem to be in love with me! [Smirks]
Gibe: ...Shut up :|"
"[Me] Looking back, as an adult, Gibe knows for certain that he was in love with Luci. And he's never felt that way about someone else...

But if loving someone in a platonic sense can mean you're sad when they're not there, then... maybe he did love his son. And his wife.

Even now, Gibe still doesn't understand what the word ""love"" means"
"[Me] All he knows is that he didn't treasure Ame's existence nearly enough. That he didn't spend enough time with his younger son.

And he's hit with an intense feeling of regret"
"[Me] Anyway I feel like Spi would take Lk out of the room just to be safe but when he next sees Gibe, Gibe just looks... empty. Spi expected his father to be angry, but there's no sense of anger at all

Just... nothingness"
[Me] (I just like the idea that part of Gibe's problem is that he doesn't know what platonic love actually is because he was never shown any himself. The only person who loved him was Luci, and that was romantic/sexual. So he has no idea how to love his family in the first place)
"[Redacted] Absolutely. The cycle of abuse..

Also Lk would feel very sorry and want to apologize to Gibe. But Gibe is actually thankful towards her... I think he would definitely see her as dear to him (Spi would be worried and doesn't want his dad to put her in trouble or hurt her, meanwhile Gibe already approves of their marriage if they eventually want to..)"
[Me] I love Gibe warming up to Lk... Her presence is healing and refreshing and he's never met someone like her before (Luci was warm and kind but he was also really fucking annoying sometimes and Lk's not like that at all lol)
"[Me] Lk asking Spi if she should leave and Spi going ""Uhhhhh honestly yeah probably"" and both of them apologising to each other

Spi expects Gibe to come out into the hallway and yell at them but he doesn't. So Spi decides to take a chance and peeks back into the room they were in and Gibe is still sitting there, gazing down at the floor"
"[Me] Spi wonders if maybe he's like... too angry to move or something (He can't understand why Gibe's behaving the way he is) and Lk pokes her head in too

Lk: Oh...
Spi: Yeah?
Lk: I think... He's still...
Spi: ?
Lk: Um... He's still crying, actually...
Spi: What"
"[Me] Upon closer look, Lk appears to be right. Spi is, well, perplexed.

He's only ever seen Gibe cry once: the night of Mother's funeral. Spi couldn't sleep, so he got up to walk around a bit, and he saw that the light in Gibe's room was still on"
"[Me] Spi can hear Gibe talking to someone -- himself? Hamber? Spi's unsure.

But there's something odd about Gibe's voice. Spi's never heard him sound like that before.

Spi pushes open the door as quietly as he can. Gibe doesn't notice him"
"[Me] Gibe's sitting on the edge of the bed, his suit dishevelled, with his head in his hands.

There are several bottles of whiskey on the bed next to Gibe. They're empty.

Spi's too scared to say anything. But something's wrong. What's his father doing?"
"[Me] Gibe's mumbling things under his breath. Spi can't hear what he's saying, but Gibe's voice is shaking. From what Spi can see of his face, Gibe looks... sad.

Spi finally realises that Gibe's crying. There are tears streaming down his face. Even though Spi recalls Gibe telling him and Ame that you're not supposed to cry"
"[Me] Gibe's voice gets slightly louder, and Spi catches a little bit of what he's been mumbling this whole time:

Mother's name. Over and over again.

None of it made any sense to Spi. After all, Father hated her, so why... was he crying over her?"
"[Me] There's something unsettling and scary about seeing Gibe cry. Gibe's always been strong and imposing to the point of being intimidating. He tends to get angry, but when he isn't, he's calm and quiet and distant.

So to see him cry loudly and openly while repeating the name of the woman he betrayed is...

Spi's not sure what it is. But he doesn't like it."
"[Me] Spi knows he'll get in trouble if Gibe catches him, so he quickly shuts the door again and leaves.

He's really confused. Nothing makes sense. Father isn't supposed to cry. Father's not supposed to be weak. He doesn't do disgraceful things.

But Spi won't say anything to Ham this time. He's learnt his lesson. He'll be a good boy and keep his mouth shut..."
[Me] So for Adult Spi to see Gibe crying again but like... quietly and Not Drunk makes him feel... frustrated, almost, although he's not entirely sure why
"[Me] Whoops I didn't meant to go that long but uh. Spi being mad at Gibe because he's known this whole time that Gibe can cry and show emotions and he's thought Gibe just straight up didn't care enough to cry over Ame pissed Spi off a lot. But now Gibe's crying finally and it's completely different?

Spi just thinks his father looks pathetic"
"[Redacted] Oh... he thinks about his ex wife... ww it's almost endearing...

Lk sure got herself in a strange family! It's not too late to run! (She wouldn't)"
[Redacted] Spi wonders if he should bring Lk over again... (though if he doesn't bring her over a while, I feel like Gibe would ask about her)
[Me] Spi making sure to keep Lk away and Gibe's like "If you dumped her you made a huge mistake" and Spi really wants to tell Gibe "I don't want to fucking hear that from you of all people" but he refrains lol
[Redacted] Yes ww and it's strange for Spi to see Gibe interested in someone else (don't worry Spi, it's platonic and he sees her as a daughter)
[Redacted] Spi talking about love with his dad...
[Me] djgks Lk isn't Gibe's type anyway, she's not defiant enough
[Redacted] Man, imagine Gibe complimenting Lk when he talks to Spi and Spi calls him out and wants to tell him not to play with him or hurt any of them like he did before with his family... he still can't exactly trust Gibe.
[Me] Gibe telling Lk she should have more confidence or something (He means it in the sense that a great person and there's no need for her to be so shy) and Spi is aghast because wtf you can't just say that to your future daughter-in-law!
[Me] But yes I want Spi and Gibe to talk about love... Even though their experiences are completely different, they do manage to find common ground...
[Redacted] Gibe ruined his chances at love but Spi isn't about to make the same mistakes <3
[Redacted] Lk would be attached to Gibe anyway which is cute ww
[Me] Gibe giving Spi a detailed list of all the mistakes he made and he's like "Basically do the opposite of what I did and you should be fine"